hais.
dunno wad tuh say.
its meaningless now.
dun think i'll ever return bk tuh dano
or match agains.
hahahs.anyyway.
it's darn great time i stop all these wishful thinkin of mine ahv.
i pierced my ear again.
this time
in e centre.
it has been long time since i went to pierce my ear
self torture yah?
feel lyke dying
why cant god jus let me die lyke this.
i haven seen him fer one week.
n it's irritatin me.
dunno y.
i jus sort of feel like.
living is very tiring.
wad shld i do.
and wad can i do?

hais.
this few days
is really depressed.
how..
i damn feel lyke dying.
wad shld i do.
i've cut myself.
this time
cuttin is nt enough.
today went bugis with adeline.
ytd crap wif her till 2 am sia.
abt relationships
nt me de la.
haha
ite soo gd sia
i also wanna go.
anyway
after hearing her say all tat
i feel even moree like crying
i'm depressssssssed
bottle it up all tuh myself.
n it is full nw.
feel like banging my head or doin sth stupid.
hope tat i can get over it soon.
if i cant.
my frens must cum attend my funeral kaes.
lol
tat-
is e last resort la.

-cant get hold of myself.

todAY..
DIN WENT SCH
COS LATE
plus i was sick
anyway
jessica went tuh cut her hair
by ye ren er hao.
hais.
>.<.
my sha qi..
alreadi din c him fer n days liao
although a few days nvr c him nia.
really really~~~~~
i lost my heart in everythingy.
wad shld i duh.
i seen tuh forget everthingy abt my workplace there.
was kanna scolded by supervisor.
say everythingy
zi hui overheard everythingy through my phone.
she's so bitchy.
hais.
dunnno wad tuh say
very confused
feel like crying.
y am i doing this?
i dun understand.
i hate myself.
wish i could die right this very moment.
does anyone kaiire abt mie?
i dun noe.truthfully.
i....
lost my heart many times.
but it seems tuh me tat tis is e worst.
wad shld i do..
someone tell me.
i cant go match or dano tata often.
i wun step inside.
except when tat bitch is nt ard.
on mondays?
then like july or jne like tat.
i'll nvr go into dano again.
but i'll watch frm e 3rd flr.
e pple i wan tuh c.
but..
still feel sth is amiss.
abt july,
i wun go in anymoree.
haix.
gt time then go storm or sandstorm kacha hair.
lol.
anyway,
it's abt time tuh let go.
let go of everythingy-

sometimes.
i really wish tat i was dead
then no one would be able tuh bully me.
or make me hurt
nor sad.
maybe.
tat day will come
soon,very soon.
tats when everythingy will cum tuh a stop.

hais.
went tuh duh project tuhday.
at jurong spring cc.
then went jp
was abt 8pm when i reached deree.
>.<
saw ye ren yi hao
was there.
dunno doing wad.
lol
stand outside.
then put his head down.
then call.
when i took my bag..
nth.
then sissy also siao siao dexxXx.
dunno y larhs.
anyway
wo bu ying gai xi huan shang na ge bai chi sdha qii de.
hais
xian zai hao lei hao lei.
saw somone at e end.
of sandstorm

...
nth tuh say lyke tat
was woken uo by mom.
damn irrritated suntimes.
slept at 1am ytd nitex.
then wake me up at 8am.
lol
anyway
went tuh jp at 1oam
ate mac wif mo in-charhe,
lee may!!!
wahaas.
she's e in charge whu dotes on me most.
in our own way.
like beating each other..
wahhhas
then opened shop
then saw kym ng filming.
started at ard 1oam
ended at ard 8pm today lol
so loong.
then no busdiness.
hais.
then today i looked weird bahs
cos.
e shop pp me keep lookin into mo shop[
due tuh certin misunderstandings.
which arenot true!
hais.
didn't c sha qi
iactually forgo the chance tuh go c him./miracle ba
then adeline n shii came find me.
today sales damn low lol.
thousand plus nia.
haish.
>.<
then when reach home
realise.
i didn'e bring b k mo water bottle
tml go take
hais.
ytd went tuh sp.
saw many many pple.
then at top up machine there
saw one damn familiar guy.
tata.
i had tuh think fer 3 sec then knew y he looked so familiar
he worked at options b4.
lol.
hahas.
then was like.
we saw each other.
then like noe n dunnno like tat.
haha.
?.<

maybe mo frens' saying ish right.

___-maybe this should be stopped,this very minute.

waaaaaaaaahs.
lols.
hadf a great time today.
after sch.
bia maths,
which was 11 25 fer our klass cos
we no nid take h1 chi
lol.
then
go cca
told cher gt tuition leave at 3pm
then
took cab home
bathed.
went jp
shi yun asked me go sp
so i went
tuh take tat form.
lol.
then at sp.
saw damn many pple
joanna dey all.
was like lols.
luckily i changed mo sch u liaox.
hahas.
then went jp.
no moviee.
so went westmall.
watched cadeaver.
yapps sth lyke tat
quite sad la.
waste mo $$
next week go watch tat 2o0 ponds dunno wad.
korean movie
after tat.
went makan pasta mania.
wahahaahaxXx.
then went home.
tml still hab tuh work
but is tml only.
wahhaaaxXx~
cnt c mo shuai ge.
so sians.
hais~~~

hais.
today was practically sleeping e whole day arhx'
even during pe.
then they go pat mo head
like i small doggy lyke tat.
waahas.
today was sleepin all e way
sick n tired ahx
pe very fun la
dunno y.
hahaaas
then went jp wif kartina
nvr c mo shuai ge
anyway
nvm
she said
jp really many shuai ge tuh watch
hais.
wad i'm suppose tuh do tml ahx
mus go wodlands there promote shoppin bags
omg.
seng siong there
...
hais
y i nvr go jp there.
>.<
hais
b5 go jp
so sad
y nt A5
hais
anyway
goin tuh jp tml.
return uniform
dano changed uniform again.
this time
dunno wad tuh say e uniform liao.
very funny ahx
dun think i'll be able tuh work in jp again.
hahas.
tats........
a gd thingy toO.

_____arghhs.penknife lost!

hais
mo panda eyes worse and worse.
went worh part time againscos
jessica took leave
y i can only c him.
tat sha qi on sundays

i feel lyke killin moself
anyway
today is last day
i'm qwuite sure of it.
miss e times at jp
lee may gettin married.
i dun hab passport.
hais
saw someone todae looks very familiar la.
tired of cuttin mo hand.
penknife lost.
wad shld i do.
WAD SHLD I DO.
ANYONE TELL ME PLS~

hais.
overall.
today was..okay?
yapps.
was in sch
then there was 3 cute guys.
frm hong kong
exchange students.
then one is 14 yrs old
so kawaii ah him
another 17.
shuai ehs.
anyway.
went tuh jp.
my panda eye n eyebag is damn obvious
esp after me cut mo hair.
then met up wif meowx n kaining.
we crapx.
then went home.
sandstorm gt new pple.
fer attachment bahs.
haha
standing there blur blur de
anyway.
e sissy bag damn cute.
today during lecture
i was damn cold la
then my temperature was like very high
so went home .
hais.
saw him today.
contented?
dunno
wish i'll stop cuttin.

ehmms.
currently no mood tuh blog
cos of someone idiotic
cant get tat person off my mind.
wad tuh do
n hw tuh concentraqte on my studies
ytd went storm cut hair.
a lady cut de la
tot gt shuai ge zai.
then whu noe he nt there
mon off ma?
or kanna transfered?
anyway
i nt very happy la
e gal went tuh rebond my hair after cuting my hair.
oh my fgod
very flat lolx.
n then i cum out tat time i din daqre to raise my head up
pple opp dano de shop was like lking
cos.
i was in dano tryin hard to make my hair bouncy'' again.
then like siao cha bo like tat
pull my hair,mess up n everything i cld do la.
then adeline jus cut fringe nia.
wad e..
then she ws there saying i cut le nt bad.
like guai kia.
wth.
anyway.
very sad la.
hais.
dunno y..
suddenly feel very moody
my face ish very fat.
then adeline sae.
durin june or july go jp cut hair again.
at sandstorm ..
lol..
dunno wad tuh sae.
i was there accompanyin her tuh c ye ren yi hao.
then she said except tat he dun hab xiong bu.
he is totally like gal.
lol
no choice la
then jessica in dano,my colleage is watch ye ren er hao
machiam like ah beng like tat.
haha
but think he is gd fren of sha qi's.
so..
also dunno wad tuh say..
anyway
time really passes real fast.
hais.
every day bia studies
n i hab tuh go jp at e same time.
tired.
but still mus manage well.
>.<...
god.
pls let me c other gd thins of life except relationships.
haha
fri goin tuh meet up wif joe
then go hkss di siao pple.
haha
then after tat go c sha qi.
then we go play bahs.
thurs.
maybe go popular buy thingyx.
i wish my hair grow fast fast.
hais.
pe..donating of blood?
pon pe tuh dnate blood on thurs.
haahs.
then today pe kanna punish push ups agains.
wad e..
but i found someone
this gal was in y chi class.
then we discovered each others' identity
omg.
so lame rites.
she is me lat time babysitter de granddaughter.
last time alwaes plae wif her dexXx.
haahs.
i.
feel like cuttin
although cut le.
gt scar
but e feelingx get stronger n stronger.
but -
tat also means i have tuh cut more n more tuh
ferget him.
pain will eraser all memories.
___bu guan fa shen she me shi.wo dou hao xiang si le yi liao bai liao.
but yong ne me xin ku!

argghx.
how i hate moself .
urgghs.
i tot i wun c him todae.
but in ened he appeared rite in front of me
yet i didnt recognise him
aaaaaaaaaaaaahssss.
wad a sad case ritex.
hais.
he was standin at sandstorm outside
i saw him walking out frm sandstorm.
then its like .
i tot is a customer.
n he stood there lookin at my shop.
fer bt 1o-15 mins
i also saw him la.
but i was there tinkin y this idiot keep lookin at moi shop direction.
then he suddenly went over tuh options e area there.
i saw him lookin in my direction.
lol
again.
i did c him n he did c me.
but i cldnt recognise him
hais.
then went toilet.
he was in sandstorm agains.
then was there lookin at him
begin tuh feel familiar.
then gt customer hab tuh go serve.
by e time i saw him
he alreadi at toy r us lers
hais
saw him n ye ren er hao
he go cut his hair.
then lyke noe liao
i still can blur till lkye tat.,
aiyo
stupiiid meeee.
then jessica n i have some sort of compromised tuh cut our hair on
fri.
the day i'm released e earliest lol.
abt 3pm like tat
then meeting joe too.
hahax.
n.
tats also e day i will keep everythingy tuh an end la.
in short.
somehow.
todae i go siao again.
go cut my hand.
this time more pro ahs.
ytd nitex use penknife
today uuse nails.
my nails very hard n long n sharp.
so useful rites
in e end realli got cut.
wrist there pain.
then whole day was like dunno y feelin somehw...
dunno wad tuh describe.
then is lyke some pple discovered sth was wrong wif me todae
cos.
they ysed weird looks to stare at me.
haah.
anyway
mornin i went imm
then in e end.
was wearin dano uniform
scared zi hui.
n some others too bahs.
cos .
ehs.
imm also gt dano
lucki nvr mitinto any dano pple there.
then is like last time i go zi hui there is
wear sch u de.
then suddenly i wear uniform 4 work
pple there diaos.
then e mini toon de short short guy semed tuh some sort
of recognise me
since e last time
he tried tuh serve us so..
seriously.
hais..
todae also kip tryin tuh serve.
i c no point.
cos there is clear stock de lol.
serve wad?
pple snatch ehs.
hai wo bang into a metal edge
leg pain now.
humophs
he is short la.
gt smoke.
hais.
then zi hui de boss suddenly cum
i run lol
go mini toons near there de
AXS machine play
then the taka guy like suddenly
walked towards me.
then looked at wad i was doin
damn ps de lol
.then went bk jp
cos rina workin at jp atrium.
todae last dae.
me also last dae le.
last dae tuh c him?
mus c e situation
c whether i can everyday stay at jp.
till closing.
frankly speaking is very tiring ehs.
have tuh wait til 9pm then can c him.
then is like i morning 6am wake up attend lessons till 5 plus.
then go home hab hw tuh do
then i cant c him fer e past 2 weeks although i'd stayed behind.
its like
i'm gettin tired of tis
make me so worn out.
if it's fate
then let it be
i'll jus have my own way of finding my
heart that rightfully belongs tuh me.

_am i thinkin too much or issit wad i'm tinkin is true-

dunno wad tuh say.
feeli lyke cutting mo hand.
cant c him.
saw wilson,wy,kh n johannes instead.
omg.
hais.
still asked me which sch i go.
so dots.
then they all till blk blk.
lucky mo supervisor nt there
if nt i kanna killed le.
hais.
anyway
seeing blah b lah makes me so...
why does he alwaes appear at e wrong time.
sumtimes i.
really hope tat i'm better off dead.
no one willkaiire anyway.
so just let me be.
the days are cumin nearer..

ehs
it seems like e frequency of miie postin posts is gettin real wide
hais.
i worked agains today.
haahs
stupid ritex
whu asked me like tuh c him so much.
though mo frens sae he look like gay.
so dots n shang xin.
no lahs
haha
anyway.
i feel like killing him rite nw.
dunno why
cos i feel lyke cutting moself.
worst of all
i bought a penknife today.
wad'll happen i dunno.
dunno wads happenin.

ehs.
it seems tuh me tat it has been quite sometime tat i've posted entries
cos busy.
last week
alomst evryday go jp
in order tuh c tat sha qi.
i even stayed till closing.
then he nvr walk down.
arghhhs
irritated
then today c him liaox
but damn stupid
cos he saw me too.
aaaaaahs.
wtd.
zihui sae he like purposely turn n look wan.
cos he cutting hair at e end of e shop
then he turn n look outside e shop
ltr cut till pple hw.
haha.
sun goin jp again
sat n sun maybe go imm find zihui
last week go liaox
the taka de pple very funny AH.
lols
anyway
pe in mi is so..
dunno wad tuh say la
i dunno wad to do nw.
hais
my mind is thinking of all e thingys i shld nt be thinkin'
or.
mus i go bk tuh e sec 2 days
whereby cutting my wrist to supress my feelinx.
it's an impt stage nw, i noe.
but.
i really cant concentrate.
hais-